12 Things Happy People Do Differently by Stephen Covey

I found this list of 12 Things Happy People Do Differently.  It was written by Stephen Covey who is the author of The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People.  He has a lot of very inspiring ideas packed into this list.  It touches on a lot of the spiritual principles of the 12 steps which I try to live out each day including: gratitude, kindness, commitment, forgiveness, and brotherly love.  It's another reminder for me to do my best each day and leave the rest for my Higher Power.  Enjoy! Bonnie J

Codependency – Detachment

Before we can begin to detach with love we need to understand what unhealthy attachments we are trying to discontinue.  We hear in Alanon and Naranon meetings to “detach from the addict with love”.  It is not about getting rid of the addict; we are the only problem we have.  Once we have a program of recovery we are able to love our family member or friend and realize they are sick people not bad people.  The disease of addiction is explained in further detail in another post by that name. 

The Basics - A “To Do” List For 12 Step Recovery

There are times, in all of our lives, when "life on life's terms" just seems to be too much. In recovery we arrange our lives so we are safe.  We don’t take chances with our serenity and our wellbeing because we work too hard in recovery.   It is always easier to find ourselves slipping and catch it then it is to start over again.  These are the suggestions that will lead to serenity and safety in recovery.

Facing our Fear in Recovery

Prior to (even during) recovery fear is an ever present, dominating feeling which can become so powerful it rules our entire life.  Often we go through life unaware our thinking and decision making is clouded or even controlled by fear. One definition of fear is: a distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, etc., whether the threat is real or imagined; the feeling or condition of being afraid. The fear experienced in the addicted family is self-centred fear; a fear of self preservation and self-seeking. Some of the fear I have uncovered in recovery have been: fear of failure, rejection, being wrong or making a mistake, responsibility, using, the future, arguments, conflict, financial problems, nothing will change/everything will change, being alone, letting my family down, getting caught, relapse both in addiction and codependency…and infinitely more, I was full of fear, but I found a solution in the 12 steps.

The Serenity Prayer

The Serenity Prayer
God grant me the serenityto accept the things I cannot change;courage to change the things I can;and wisdom to know the difference.Living one day at a time;Enjoying one moment at a time;Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;Taking, as He did, this sinful worldas it is, not as I would have it;Trusting that He will make all things rightif I surrender to His Will;That I may be reasonably happy in this lifeand supremely happy with HimForever in the next.

-Reinhold Niebuhr     

Many 12 step groups use the beginning of this prayer to open a meeting.  It is also the starting point of many important parts of recovery: spiritual contact, practicing the spiritual principles of serenity, acceptance, courage, faith, trust, willingness, wisdom, letting go, asking for help, living by God's will, and examining life through prayer and meditation.  I’m sure there are many more ideas people have about this prayer, please share them in the comments.
Over the next while I want to look at the ideas in the prayer as well as the spiritual principles and how they can be applied to our life.  Please feel free to comment on anything, I’d love to learn from you.

What I Hope to Share & My Goals

My journey has allowed me to learn about the 12 steps of recovery and now I'm trying to Live the Steps. This is a life long journey without a destination, only growth spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically.

Sharing my journey of healing
I will share what I have learned about:
1. Recovery - living the 12 steps, just for today
2. Mindfulness and meditation
3. Living with Chronic Pain - suffering is optional
4. PTSD and Anxiety - I have reclaimed my life
I hope that this will become a conversation, that my posts will just be a starting point.

My main goals
1. To live in the solution
2. Stay positive
3. To have an attitude of gratitude
4. Keep my life centered around my Higher Power
5. To love and learn from the people put in my journey

I learn the most in my trials and mistakes...that's my life. Please feel free to comment on anything in this blog. It is through dialogue that I learn and remain teachable.